Hello Everyone.
I have to thank you all for your continuing support of my blog, something I am struggling with. Someone on my blog asked how I was doing recently, so I am going to let you know, rightly or wrongly, opening my heart, I shall hopefully make it brief.
I am not in a good place and find card making and blogging too much pressure at this time. You may say 5 months after he died I should be feeling OK now. I'm afraid it's not that easy for me. He was my life and I had been with him since I was 16, 63 years. A few of you will know how I am feeling. I had to let you know that I will try to visit you, and appreciate your wonderful work, and the inspiration it gives me. I will continue to make cards, with difficulty, and try to blog them too, as I have said many times we are a large family, so plenty to make. Time seems to get away from me, with extra tasks to do now, and struggling with my condition.
Please know I appreciate you all for your messages, help, and the love that comes through too. I will get there, but things are popping up that I am finding difficult to deal with, like our beautiful garden, today the gardener I employed said he doesn't do weeding etc. He did grudgingly do the hedges that needed a prune. Martin always kept it so beautiful, and no one wants the work involved.
My apologies for revealing my worries, but that's part of what is going on, making blogging seem not so important. I hope I will find time to visit you all at least occasionally.
Thank you all again.
14 comments:
I’m so sorry you are struggling Faith but really it is not surprising .. 5 months is no time at all after such a long life together. Many of us dread being left alone and having all those practical worries to deal with, let alone the emotional cost. Take your time .. card making and blogging are good if they are a pleasure or solace for you, but they should not be a source of pressure or stress. Take care and just do what you can. Sending hugs xx
I'm not surprised you are struggling. Bereavement isn't easy at any time. It's awful that someone employed to do a job only wants the 'easy bits'. You probably don't reach out for help as you have been part of a solid team for so many years but I'm sure the younger family members could help you find a gardener whose willing to do the full job or ask neighbours if they know of anyone. Know that you are not alone. WakeyL
Five months is no time at all for such a loss, I feel for you Faith and I am sure everyone else will too. I hope things eventually get easier for you. I hope you can carry on crafting, it does help I know but can be a struggle, take care of yourself. xx
Not surprised you are still struggling Faith, 5months is no time at all after 63 years so don't be too hard on yourself. A gardener who doesn't do weeding!!! Time to get rid and find someone who is more helpful. Card making and blogging help as a distraction but not when they become a chore-we are all here for you and if you want to rant or open your heart-go ahead sometimes a lot easier than talking to family. No need to stress about commenting-we will survive. Take care of yourself Faith.
Carol x x x
Sorry to hear you are finding life difficult at the moment, Faith. 63 years is a long time to be with someone and I’m not surprised you are still grieving after only 5 months. I hope you are getting lots of support from family and friends and never be afraid to ask for help. Keep card making and blogging when you can, but don’t let it become stressful for you. Ask around for recommendations for another gardener or there may be a local teenager who would be happy to do the weeding for a little pocket money. Look after yourself….. sending you a big (((HUG))).
Liz xx
I can only echo what others have said and send my heartfelt love to you Faith.
B x
Grief is not measured on a calendar Faith, and your enormous loss will take the time that is right for you. Dealing with each day as it comes without putting pressure on yourself to craft or blog when you don't want to may help. Just know that your bloggy friends will be here if and when you are ready to return. Sending a big hug,
Carol xxx
Thinking of you!
Do what you can, and don't worry about thee rest!
I appreciate you sharing your feelings. I'm sending a big hug to you Faith. Time goes by so quickly. But in reality, it has not been long. You need to give yourself a break and not expect so much from yourself. Lean on family, lean on friends, and lean on those that follow your blog. We are here for you, too. Love and hugs, Loll
Take time to heal. Sending hugs. Anesha
It would be someone very cold to expect anyone to be ok after 5 months, even if you had only been together a couple of years yet alone a life time. You need to take the time you need, blogland will be here when you are ready but do not feel pressured by it, take each day at a time as you feel - no one else can know and if they are putting pressure on you then tell them to back off for a while, you can only grieve your way and no-one elses! ..........thats no gardener - just someone who wants money for very little work, ask on your local facebook group for a good local gardener who is happy to do all the jobs you want inc weeding and im sure you will get plenty of genuine recommendations from people who have used them. Our local FB group is brilliant for those type of things, when you haven't a clue where to ask/look etc be it a gardener, mechanic or just a handy person to put up a shelve etc... Sending you massive positive vibes and hugs Emmaxxx
As others have said 5 months is not long enough to grieve for a lifetime of love. You have so many challenges and I hope you receive the help you need. A gardener who doesn't weed is not a gardener! No gardener wants to see the work they do hindered by weeds and would take it as part and parcel of the work. Thinking of you. Hugs Lynn x
You take as much time as you need. Grief is different for everyone. It's hard enough losing brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and other family members, but I can't imagine the hurt of losing your partner. I totally understand he was literally your life. My heart hurts for you, and again, take as much time as you need. We all know what you're going through and there is certainly no rush. Sending lots of love and prayers.
You know I am thinking of you Faith, just take the time to do what is best for you and take care xx
Post a Comment